Is It Time To Kickstart Mrs. Steinberg’s Puckered Starfish?

steinberg-thrillerFriends, I come to you as a man of peace. In the past I have questioned Gene Steinberg’s integrity as an entity in the ufo field and as a man in… you know… life. But no more. I recognize a person in genuine need when I see one and Gene is such a person. Rather, Gene’s wife is such a person. Rather, Gene’s wife’s bloody asshole is such a… person? Sure. Person.

Before you stop reading to write me your hate mail, allow me to allow Gene to explain in all his exclamation mark glory. In “An Important Message From Gene Steinberg!” dated 09/21/2016 titled, “Barbara Continues To Suffer!” we read:

In the past couple of weeks, Barbara has spent an increasing amount of time in the bathroom, suffering. Her colorectal condition (not cancerous) appears to have grown worse. She has an appointment with a specialist in early October ahead of needed surgery.

But in order to have that surgery, I have to make sure her coverage, with United Healthcare (via the Obamacare exchange) is current. That’s before the copays that can get expensive, way beyond that I can afford.

Now I couldn’t have gotten this far without the generous assistance of my readers and listeners. I will never forget your generosity.

If you can help me further to get over this hump, please do what you can.

It’s truly heartbreaking. Here is a man who just barely raised enough money from fans to pay his bills, move to a new home, and pay the cleaning fees. Now, while he continues to work on working on boosting cash flow (a work in progress), the buttocks of his lovely wife is set to explode.

Well not on my watch or your dime, folks.

Gene, if you’re reading this–please stop taking people’s money. Not because it looks like  you’re a fraud. Not because it looks like you’re addicted. Not because you’re no better than Greer or Bassett. Not because it’s fucking disgusting that any man would shame his wife this way and part of me suspects the only reason you’re doing this is to bait me so you can tell people what a malicious bastard I am for writing this and gain more sympathy coin that way, in which case I deserve a cut and will gladly provide my paypal info if you email me. Not even because in a plea titled, “The Landlord’s Warning!” dated June 24, 2014, you wrote:

Despite making some progress with back rent in the past couple of weeks, the landlord is becoming more insistent. He sent me this text message on my mobile phone the other day: ‘I need to get another payment soon. Your balance is $1589 dollars.’

This includes two months rent and various late/legal charges, so you can see my rent is relatively cheap. By ‘soon,’ he told me days not weeks, and he still reserves the right to send the sheriff to have me ejected at any time.

I still owe back payments for insurance, utilities and so on and so-forth. I’ve paid some of it, but I owe a lot, still, which explains the sleepless nights.

As I said, I have [been] working very hard to get out from under this financial mess and build a reliable income, and maybe get a little retirement income before it’s too late. I have more ad deals pending for the radio shows, and am working to get payments as soon as I can. There are long-range plans, too, so I’m not sitting still.

But I need to get past the current crisis, so if you can possibly help me out again, I hope you’ll consider doing so as soon as possible.”

–and then 2 months later (08/25/2014 to be exact) were caught in  the Optima forum bragging, “I have a 2014 Optima EX with Premium package. I didn’t bother [with] the Technology package, with [the] navigation system and other options, not just because of the expense. My iPhone 5s is a perfectly good navigation tool when I need one.”

No, not because of any of your deplorable acts. Stop taking people’s money because I am going to help your wife. Anyone who has watched No One’s Watching: An Alien Abductee’s Story (which, granted, is no one) has one general takeaway from the film: I’ve got a large ass. A large, nearly hairless white ass. Ass enough for two people. Ass enough for your wife, Gene. And giving her the benefit of the doubt, hairless enough.No Ones Watching

That’s right, if she (or you on her behalf) accept my offer–and if it’s a legal surgery in the States or Mexico–I would like to donate a piece of my winking wormhole to heal your wife’s shit-eating frown.

I don’t know if it’s covered under Obamacare, but we can work out those finer details. I have a healthy, overly ripe, plump buttocks for the taking. If she needs ass, I’ve got ass. Gene, I am here to help. Do not let this opportunity pass her by. Or you could get a job ripping tickets at your local movie theater and buy her some Preparation H. Your call. Either way, know that while you’re full of shit it’s your wife who is suffering. And I am here to help.


27 thoughts on “Is It Time To Kickstart Mrs. Steinberg’s Puckered Starfish?

  1. You’re right about one thing. Steinberg has taken over from the late James Brown as the Hardest Working Man in show business. The amount of time Gene spends shilling and begging is truly amazing! If only he could get over the hump, or is that rump?

  2. I couldn’t help but wonder what Gene is up to these days are far as his living situation is. I did a couple of quick Google searches, and I easily found his address. It was in the Arizona White Pages here –

    Then I plugged in that address and find that he is living in a VERY nice gated community!

    I am stunned. I thought he was dead broke. I thought he couldn’t even afford the “slum” he used to live in.

    Just…wow. I know this article is several months old, but I just thought I’d share with whoever may still be even a little bit curious.

  3. The asshole Gene Steinberg is still begging for money. Once again, the landlord is going to throw him out. Oh really?! I googled his address and looked at the streetview and YES he does live in a high-end GATED community. Don’t be suckered! This man is living off-of ALL of us! If he is so hard up for cash, Mrs. Steinberg should get a job and stop sitting on her fat ass trying to pass a stool. A bit of mobility would do her bowels some good. Gene Steinberg is nothing but a con man. Don’t be duped like others have.

  4. Aaaaaaaand…he’s now playing emotional blackmail. He says in today’s letter – “Maybe it would have been better for everyone if I hadn’t survived that car crash.” It’s in this letter –
    I do feel badly for him; I can’t help it. But he’s been doing this for 10 years. In one of his recent “explanations” he says that when he began asking for help that it wasn’t for him, it was for his brother-in-law. However, he never responded to the fact that he himself has been begging for years since then. He hopes that by mentioning the family that we would forget that he then rode those coattails and still is. I feel badly for his wife, mostly. I cannot begin to imagine what she is going thru…

  5. What a bunch of drivel BWAHAHAHA you are still pissed that I took your place on the Paracast forum, aren’t you, Vaeni? Doing so much better than you and leave Barbara alone, it’s her ass, quit acting like one!

  6. “The purpose of my podcasting and novel-writing is to keep me away from the trap of an ordinary, inglorious job in the economy that will never make me rich and/or famous, and will only ever keep a modest roof over my head. Every day I don’t get such a job is another day that I haven’t given up on the dream that I will be notable and successful. If that dream can’t come true, then I’d still rather die a failed radio host and sci-fi author, than a ‘successful’ burger flipper or big-box greeter.”

    Wow. That sounds familiar. That may be because I had that attitude myself. When I was twenty. After reality kicked my ass a few times, I decided to get my head out of there. Not only did my ass hurt, but I had a bad headache too. I went and got a job. Sure enough, I never became a rich-and-famous artist. But I did pull my weight, pay my bills, and enjoy some things I never had the money for as a starving artist. I never once considered begging. But then I didn’t give myself only two choices, artist or menial laborer. Unless one is a total schmuck, there are many other possibilities.

    Obviously Mr. Steinberg thinks his behavior is normal. This is worrisome. There have been many possible causes for this aberrant behavior put forth, from laziness to entitlement to mental health problems. One idea I have not seen though is this: Is the begging just his way of squeezing “royalties” from those who listen to his programs or use his website or co-host or appear on his show? Maybe all of the above? There is considerable overlap possible. Whatever the cause, it has pushed an awful lot of good, thoughtful and talented people away from the show and the forum. That’s a shame.

    There you go, Gene. That’s for banning me instead of doing what any competent, sane admin would do when asked: simply closing my account since you do not allow users to to that themselves. I have decided you and your minion are just nuts. That’s the only rational explanation for the shit show you have going on over there. My banning speaks far more to your character (or lack of) than it does mine. My participation over there speaks for itself. Whatever of it you have not deleted.


  7. For the last several days he’s been asking people to go and help him pack. Yes…help him pack. Help him pack because even tho he KNEW he was getting kicked out, he couldn’t be bothered? There was even a date set for the constable to lock him out and he still wasn’t packed. *facepalm* And don’t forget that he has a back injury so don’t expect him to lift. Or pack. Yes…I can’t wrap my head around the fact that after a couple of Court Orders and a date set for a lock-out he still hasn’t packed.
    So, if anybody is in the Phoenix area, he can offer you pizza and Diet Coke if you go and help him pack. And to top it all off, he sent out a couple of his packing requests out on the Paracast Newsletter letterhead. I wonder if his co-host has had it with him and is considering walking. Or maybe not. Maybe he’s helping old Gene pack…

  8. Sorry to add, but he just said (he’s sent out 2 letters today) that his son is helping him to reduce expenses. I’m sure a lot of us wonder why he can’t move in with his son if being homeless is the only other option if his fans don’t pay for his move (he needs about another $1875) or how about that sister of his wife? Helene? Since it was her husband who made him impoverished, shouldn’t SHE take them in rather than have them go homeless? This all started with her husband’s shady dealings and fraud charges, so I’d think it is unconscionable for her to allow them to be kicked out onto the street. I’m not being sarcastic; I’m being serious. There is no reason that between Gene’s son and Barbara’s sister that they should be homeless.

  9. The guy is completely shameless. I’m banned, but my inbox still gets filled up with his spam. Fortunately it’s a disposable account that I seldom look at. If I lived nearby, it would be a bit tempting to go over and “help him move” just to see what kind of hovel he’s being evicted from. If indeed he is being evicted. Maybe his marks have been extra generous and he’s moving to a nicer place. You can’t tell. I don’t believe anything he says anymore. At least he never tricked me out of a penny. It would all be funny if it wasn’t so stupid.

  10. He is indeed evicted and apparently got lucky enough to sucker some other poor soul into letting him move into a new place “and overlook the blemishes on our credit.” I’m so glad that you didn’t give him any money, Double Nought Spy. I haven’t, either, thank goodness. What gets me even more this time (and you are right, it would be funny if it wasn’t so stupid!) he not only got his marks to pay for him to get into a new place, but that he also got them to PACK for him this time! So, Gene is like – “pay my moving expenses, pay my deposit, pay my first and last month’s rent, and by the way, also come over and PACK my stuff, and oh, yes, I can’t lift, so you lift all my crap, too! Thank you so very much and here’s your Diet Coke and pizza…”

  11. Heh. I’m ready. Is there a way to post screen shots here directly? Actually, I’ve saved a lot of stuff to email. I think I could get the creeps thrown off their forum platform for flagrant TOS violations, but I won’t do it unless they post too much bullshit here. To say they have ethical problems over there is to say Antarctica has a lot of ice. I can prove it. Gene loves to delete stuff that makes him look bad, but I’ve saved most of the more egregious things I’ve seen. Some of it came and went within minutes in the wee hours. Anyway, gotta go to work. I’ll check back this evening.

  12. You’re right, Jayvay, but if people are new to him, and I’m sure there are new people all the time, blogs like this will help them realize that there is no way in hell they should ever give him money. You’re blog saved me from being duped, and I thank you. 🙂

  13. I really don’t mean to spam, but there is one more thing I want to say. I hoped Gene would come here and let his potential donors know why his son can’t take him in. Yes, he’s in Spain, but if it comes down to starving on the street, there is no reason they can’t go to him. I’m sure he’d beg for funds for a plane ticket.
    Also, why can’t that sister, who happens to have a nice house in Scottsdale, take them in since her husband made them broke to begin with. Okay, enough from me for now! Take care, everyone!

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