And Now My Monty Python Interpretive Dance (In Convenient Word Form) Of A Jacobsian Encounter

Person
I have something lodged in my leg. Is there a doctor in the house?

David Jacobs
I’m a doctor.

Person
What are you a doctor of?

David Jacobs
American History.

Person
Oh. Are you qualified to remove this thing from my leg?

David Jacobs
No, but I can hypnotize you and get you to see what it is.

Person
Oh. Are you qualified to do that?

David Jacobs
No, but by the time I’m done you might not want it removed, which will save you a trip to the hospital.

Person
Oh. Why is that?

David Jacobs
Because you might think it’s an alien implant.

Person
Oh. You think it is?

David Jacobs
I don’t know. Let’s get you hypnotized and find out.

Person
Will it hurt?

David Jacobs
There will be some mental scarring, sure. And your world view will go out the window, granted.
But it’s not as painful as having that thing stuck in your leg, is it?

Person
Actually, the thing doesn’t hurt.

David Jacobs
Of course it does. That’s just a screen sensation of numbness where pain should be. Aliens are crafty.

Person
How will you do this if you’re not qualified?

David Jacobs
It’s simple: I hypnotize you and bring you back to the time you got that thing stuck in your leg.
Without asking any leading questions, I get you to see past the experience of falling down
and scraping your leg to where aliens actually implanted something there.
IF that happened. We don’t know.

Person
Oh. But isn’t all of this leading?

David Jacobs
Relax… I’ve been on television.

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5 thoughts on “And Now My Monty Python Interpretive Dance (In Convenient Word Form) Of A Jacobsian Encounter

  1. How perfect is Jacobs’ picture? (He looks like the nutty professor and appears kindly – the perfect “venus fly trap” due to the damage this guy has inflicted on hapless victims. I could see myself falling victim to his incompetence and agendas, too, if I were desperate for answers and didn’t know what I know now.)

  2. You left out the part where Jacobs cautions that, even though we don’t know exactly what happened, it was ABSOLUTELY TERRIFYING!

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