Inception Dialogues: The Best Interview I’ve Ever Given

I haven’t heard it back but it sure felt like the best. Great questions, great conversation. Great host. Check out Bernardo Kastrup’s website and start following his show. I think he’s got a good thing going here. http://www.inceptiondialogues.com/

(For an .m4a version, click HERE and “save link as.” Check out the Inception Dialogues website for iTunes feed and further info.)

 

Or, for those of you who want the bullet points, here is a ten minute “digest” version….

 

Did I Ever Think I Was Crazy?

well-rested

The face of crazy.

Thanks, those of you who tuned in to Paranormal Waypoint last night. I didn’t expect to go through a primer of my personal history from A-liens to Z-eus.(1)  But I’m glad I did because I think it’s important to remember where I (Jeff Ritzmann and I, actually) come from. I think when we tear apart the crappy research that has come to define alien abductions and ufology as a whole, it’s easy to forget that we’re experiencers, not debunkers. We’re not just experiencers, though–we’re really out there experiencers of some unabashedly outlandish stuff. We’re also discerning skeptically-minded people. We have to be. These are our lives we’re talking about here and we would like to see these subjects handled with care.

One question Jeff asked me was if I ever thought I was crazy. He was asking about the spiritual shenanigans–an energy in me, Jer 2.0, that wakes me up psychically and moves the body into yogic postures, tai chi movements, whirling dervish twirls, and things I haven’t the foggiest clue about. I had only a minute to respond so I said “No.” I’d like to explain that a bit….

With the unknown phenomena we seem all too eager to name “alien abduction” I did ponder the crazy question–or at least delusional. I remained open to the real possibility that because I saw this brilliant UFO in 8th grade that was other-worldly in appearance I then read up on UFOs and alien abductions and assumed I was an abductee. Perhaps every little creak, every little bump in the night and alien dream added up to me being an abductee simply because I saw an object I couldn’t explain and read some books that interpreted it for me. Maybe, just maybe, I suffered a neurotic snowball effect from that one sighting. I entertained that idea for years; seeing the Wee People of Wherever at my bedside in October 2001 changed that.

Even so, I could make a George Hansen style Trickster hypothesis work here and it goes something like this: I saw a UFO in 8th grade. I obsessed over it well into adulthood. I feared having intimate relationships with women because I didn’t want to bring this into their lives. As a result, the night after I had sex for the first time–in New York City fresh off of the 9/11 attacks, no less–I saw aliens. This is thanks to the anti-structural context I found myself in culturally and personally coupled with a release of the aforementioned deeply held fear, because aliens didn’t show up when I lost my virginity. I breathed a sigh or relief and then, like a cosmic joke, they showed up the next night instead.

It’s The Secret in action, right? You obsess, you let go, you receive from the universe. Maybe. It doesn’t really fly with me because of all the evidence (and by that I mean personal experiences of the ufological and paranormal variety) I’m glossing over to make this work.

The point is, with alleged  aliens I can see some ways in which I could have deluded myself. But the spiritual stuff? Emphatically NO. I know making declarative statements is taboo but I DO know what this energy is doing overall, even if I don’t understand the details or the mechanics. And I know without it we will never be whole. We will always be dysfunctional egos running the world into the mud. We are fundamentally flawed and in 2.0 mode you see that this is not human nature–this is humans running from nature and calling it human nature so they never have to confront the issue.

That is what we do.

The spiritual stuff is me. But the alien abduction stuff happens to me. Anything that is not me is open to debate.(2) A lot more guess work and a lot less acceptance goes into a presumably outside intelligence interacting with me. I can include the question of hallucinations and delusion there. But this energy I talk about is in me every moment. It is as undeniable as my arms and legs.

Finally, when I talk about the energy as an it, this is just a convenience of language. I don’t want to give the impression that I’m the host to some possessive intelligence or something along those lines. It’s not that–although there’s no law that says one intelligent energy has to manifest as one intelligence. After all, look at the universe. Look closer–look at Earth. Look at the chattering human psyche.

Look at you.

———————
(1) Sorry. That’s as “god” as I can get with a Z. I’m part Greek so it works, right?
(2) Yes, I know at the core all is one but I’m talking about the day to day level in which we exist.

Now Available – “I Know Why The Aliens Don’t Land!” for the Kindle!

I Know Why Book CoverToday I’ve launched the Kindle version of my 1st book, I Know Why The Aliens Don’t Land! (Available on the Nook at a later date TBA.)

Rereading it as I formatted it–Oh my god, so many great stories. I’d forgotten a lot of it. That is to say, a lot of the details of my life. I actually found myself rooting for this character I had to remember was me!

So, if you missed out on the paperback, here comes the ebook, finally. If this sells well I will release the all-but-abandoned sequel, The Skeleton Key To All Worlds at least as an ebook; maybe as a paperback.

As always, thanks for reading!

–jer

Description: 

Alien abductee Jeremy Vaeni takes us on a whirlwind tour of his life and the world around him to illustrate exactly why aliens do not publicly land and greet us with open arms. I Know Why The Aliens Don’t Land! is a revelation with laughter. It is what happens when a true outside mystery injects its presence into the cynical mind of Generation X.
Acclaim:
“[A] wild ride with many curves and loops…fascinating.” - Jim Marrs, author of Alien Agenda and Rule By Secrecy
“In many ways, his book reminded me of classic Hunter S. Thompson: Gonzo, containing a plethora of entertaining characters and situations; but most important of all, having something significant and relevant to impart, and to make the reader think, ponder, consider and absorb his words on all-things alien and more.” - Nick Redfern, author of The Pyramids and the Pentagon, Final Events, and Contactees
“Vaeni soars and cleaves in the spirit of the finest Giordano Bruno and, that good, may even live to grace the stake of same.” - Alfred Lehmberg, Alien Views“If you’re looking for quick answers and a linear narrative, numerous hair raising events, surgical extractions of implants, and analytical discussions on what those little guys are doing invading our homes and bodies, you’re going to be disappointed. But if you want a meaningful answer as to what those little guys are doing invading our homes and bodies, you’ll get it, as Lt. Colonel Philip Corso would say, if you can take it. Vaeni’s style is quirky and engaging, and restlessly jumps from one expositional form to another, making his points in the style he deems best suited for the moment. The spine of the book is the use of an ongoing interview — a device employed by no less than Aristotle in his Dialogues — between a ‘Norm De Plume’ and himself. Beyond this, the book is a kaleidoscope of prose techniques, including news clippings, poems, and both first and third person narratives. Though not born of blogging and the internet, his style suits the blogosphere well — quick, punchy, and irreverent. We get to know Vaeni in candid — even explicit — detail. He engages us quickly. We get to know and care about him, and because of this we are willing to follow down the twists and turns of his story. The payoff of the book is long in coming, and this reader found this distracting. Though enjoined in the author’s introduction to not read but to experience the book, I began to find the teasing detours and the crazy quilt of the prose a bit tedious. Hitting Chapter 11 and confronted with the title ‘time out for song, poem, story, and ranting’ (page 50) I lost patience with it and jumped to the end of the book and skimmed back to find an unwavering discussion on the subject of aliens pick up at Chapter 53, page 310 out of the book’s 381. And yet, I went back to read the rest. What at first blush appear to be long digressions on unrelated matters — his emotionally torturous love life as a high school student and young adult, coming to (and living through the culture shock) of New York City, a very long narrative about his career at Nickelodeon studios and an intensely frustrating affair — give us context, helps us understand the paradoxical nature of Vaeni’s struggles, and adds to the overall ambiance. (I will never be able to think about Nickelodeon as anything other than a corporate political nightmare again.) These same needs could probably have been fulfilled more quickly, and possibly more effectively — the fiction writer in me would wanted to have seen a more linear narrative, demonstrating the interplay between the personal events of his life and the paranormal ones. One could argue these tangents help exposition the human condition, one of the overall points of the book, but can’t help but feel like uncorrelated — albeit absorbing — digressions. Despite the book’s flaws, it is an engaging book for two reasons Vaeni is an excellent writer. He engages, he plays, he doesn’t rest. The vitality of his prose never flags. He has understood the painfully obvious fundamental (and all-too-frequently ignored) rule of writing: a writer’s work needs to be interesting. Beyond this, the real strength of I Know Why the Aliens Don’t Land! is the personality and personableness of the narrator. It comes through clearly. We know Jeremy Vaeni, we care about him, and because we care about him we forgive him his excesses and listen to his wisdom when he finally offers it.” - Daniel Brenton, blogger for The Meaning of Existence (and all that)

One Fierce Abduction Times Two

I Know Why Book CoverI wrote a sequel of sorts to my first book I Know Why The Aliens Don’t Land! titled The Skeleton Key To All Worlds. Ultimately, I scrapped the project and picked from its parts material that became Urgency.

If nothing else, these beings we call “alien” love a well-timed joke. The joke they played on me was giving me my most in-your-face encounter with them I’d ever had shortly after publishing I Know Why The Aliens Don’t Land! Naturally, I wrote it into the unpublished sequel.

I’m toying with the idea of releasing an ebook version of I Know Why… with material from The Skeleton Key To All Worlds but formatting it is daunting and I have other projects on my plate at the moment. However, I told the Paratopia Facebook Group I’d publish this encounter from The Skeleton Key… on my blog, so here it is.

The first part comes from chapter 6–called Cyber Six because it details in typical comically-crass me fashion my first time having sex with a gal I met online. Her screen name was Wildcherry, so that’s what I use as a pseudonym. The important point here for all you Trickster theorists is, I had a fear of intimacy revolving around the fear that I’d be introducing this abduction stuff into my significant other’s life. Night one I lost my virginity and breathed a sigh of relief that no “aliens” stuck their probes through the wall like Porky’s. Night two, on the other hand–boom! Porky’s 2: The Next Day. Wait, no–I mean aliens. Just ridiculous with that comic timing again. 

And with that, we pick up in the middle of the chapter….

excerpt from Cyber Six

Later that night….

Wildcherry and I are snoozing away the wee dawn hours on my floor mattress. I don’t know what time it is but it must be between three and six because we got to sleep really late and it isn’t light out yet.  Correction: it is light out. It’s very light out. In fact there’s so much light pouring in through my bedroom windows that it wakes me. The quality of light is strange. It’s bright yet dull. Foggy.  Like the sun shining evenly through a thick, thick fog.

I prop myself up on my left arm and just stare at this. Wildcherry remains out cold, unmoved by the brightness. I collapse onto my back and now see that there are three beings standing over me to my right. I am terrified but don’t scream. The beings are short, not more than four feet tall.  They are wearing brown tunics. Their skin is gray and from what I can see of their hooded heads they are bald. They have diminutive facial features, save for the eyes, which are huge black oval pools. If human eyes are the windows to the soul these eyes are windows to the infinite depths of everything.

There is something else curious about them: They have a playful nature. The one closest my face, at least, is smirking and exudes this childlike naivety. It is as if they want me to come play and yet I am horrified beyond the meaning of the term. They never speak a word to me. Wildcherry remains unconscious.

The next thing I know—and there is no transition here, it’s literally just the very next moment—I am standing in another room altogether. I’m wearing the boxer shorts I went to sleep in. The room is long and open, not quite cavernous but the illusion of that given the lighting.

About ten feet in front of me begins a row of tables vertical to my sightline. I’m not sure how many tables there are, maybe 5. They’re lit from above by unseen sources. The fixtures, if indeed that’s what they are, give off that same misty/foggy light that had flooded my room. These are the only sources of illumination. Outside of the tables, everything is black and empty.

There are people lying on the tables. Humans. Strangers. Men and women. Naked. Immobile. Unconscious. One closest to me is a blond-haired woman, Caucasian, in her late forties or early fifties. A bunch of similar beings—maybe even the same ones who brought me here—stand around her table. They are examining her in an inclusive way as if letting me in on the situation, like they’re saying, “See? This is what we do for a living.”

Standing there and observing this, I’m totally calm, the antithesis of the terror that plagued me when they stood in my bedroom. ‘Why am I seeing this,’ I wonder silently.

A female voice answers in my head, “Because you’ve always wanted to remember an abduction.” The voice is calm, soothing, and familiar. I know this woman. I know this woman. She is not human and I am not on earth.

The telepathic voice and I have a lengthy discussion. I remember it long enough to jot it when I’m returned to my bed, but I don’t. I let it go.

This wasn’t a dream, this was real. But it couldn’t be. What are the odds? That light in my window… Why didn’t it wake the whole neighborhood? No, this was a dream.

No it wasn’t.

Vivid dream.

No it wasn’t.

Shut up and sleep.

Okay.

————

In the following chapter, we get a sequel, of sorts. It’s not a lot but just enough to confirm the first incident. I could no longer hide behind the “It couldn’t have happened because the light outside would have woken up all of Queens” denial. Here we see that the foggy light isn’t, for instance, shining down from an aerial ship. It could be a portal; it could be something else. Whatever it is, the fact that it appeared the first time outside my window does not indicate that it wasn’t concentrated right there and/or directional for only me to see.

CHAPTER 24

I had no direct link between the meditation energy and alien abductions. After I’d initiated it back in the old apartment there was a night when I felt and heard an enormous crunch followed by a boom high up in my nasal cavity. I felt it reverberate throughout my skull. I thought I was having an aneurysm and was about to die. It felt like it should have hurt but somehow I was anesthetized so the episode felt numb as opposed to excruciating.

Instead of dying, this really bad sci-fi grid of the earth appeared in my mind’s eye. It was a green 3-D model of our planet. It was spinning slowly, as earth is prone to do, and then suddenly ice from the north slid over the North American continent.  This wasn’t a vision in the same way I’d have visions bleed into view years later. This was more like a computer simulation…uuuuuh…beamed into me, for lack of a better term. It crackled and popped with an electricity I could see. I’m tellin’ ya, it looked like a bad Atari graphic, but it did its job. I now feared some huge natural catastrophe was going to happen in my lifetime. I figured this was an alien transmission but do I really know?

The second connection was much stronger. This happened in the deep AM of April 17, 2004. I was asleep in bed.  I thought I was dreaming that the meditation energy was tapping lines over my face with my hands the way I’d described earlier. The energy does a lot of this tapping, like pressure-point therapy, all over my body. The patterns remind me of the lines native peoples paint on their bodies. Ever wonder where they got the idea?

I thought I was dreaming because this ended with my left hand pinching the bridge above my right nostril like one would do for a bloody nose. The meditation energy had never woken in me while I was asleep before, had never done anything mundane like pinch my nose. I didn’t actually have a bloody nose, so in my tired stupor I thought I was dreaming the whole thing.

The timing of what happened next is hazy. It could have been shortly after or maybe hours later. Not sure. But the next thing I remember happening is waking up because my bedroom was lit up. I thought the sun was rising and invading through my window. I was lying on my right side, facing the wall. I opened my eyes to find my wall missing. Where my wall with its posters and pictures should have been was this field of blinding white light. It was the same quality of evenly-distributed dull light as I’d experienced that October night with Wildcherry 3 years prior.

As I was lying there staring confusedly into the void that had once been my wall, my nose began to bleed. It didn’t bleed out, though. Instead, it trickled down my throat. Nosebleeds are common to abductees and other forms of nerd, so I think I might have been visited by nerds that night—aliens! Visited by aliens!—and the meditation energy cauterized my nose in preparation of the event so that I wouldn’t bleed all over the sheets. Per usual I didn’t bolt out of bed hysterically screaming or leap through the energy field into Narnia. At least I don’t think I did. Huh.

I don’t recall what happened next and, in fact, I’d forgotten about the episode entirely until I’d climbed out of bed at a decent hour and scampered into the kitchen. There I spoke at length with a subletting roommate named Brian. In the middle of our conversation my nose bled out the left nostril and onto my shirt. With the red torrent rushed memory of the previous night as described.

Welcome, Brian: I’m a bleeder.

This incident was the most solid link I could make between the meditation energy and alien abductions. However, just a month prior, that other quality of energy—the one that enters through the spine—the one I’d only felt twice before, the first unspectacularly, the second ending in possession—remember that? Still with me here? Yeah, on March 25th, 2004 that energy welled up for a third and, as of this book, final time. It was the most spectacular experience of all and one I believed all of this meditation nonsense must have been leading to, for on that morning, just before 6:00am… I became God.

Jeff and I Reunite This Thursday – GAME ON!

Thursday, March 21st
11pm (EST)/8pm(PST)

http://www.kgraradio.com/

It’s The Jeff. It’s The Jer. It’s Jeff’s new show, Paranormal Waypoint. It’s finally happening.

Please listen in, chat in the chat room–and call in ya sissies. Ask that question you’ve always wanted answered.

 

 

Me On Future Theater Saturday At 6pm EST

That’s right, I’ll be live with Bill & Nancy Birnes Saturday at 6pm here: http://www.futuretheater.com/

Just last night a little lightbulb went off in my head pertaining to the high strangeness associated with “alien abductions” that I think is a tangible clue neurologists might be able to work with. We’ll explore that and much more. Be sure to tune in!

Final Insight of 2012 – For Repeat Experiencers Who ‘Don’t Want This’

IOriginal Theme Glyph 2008 - Melissa Reedn Paranormal World the rules of normalcy are often backwards or missing. This is part of what differentiates a highly strange experience from the norm and makes us question our sanity and then reality itself. “Reality” here means Western logical reductionist reality where materialism and laws of physics are everything. “Unreality” might be a better word.

In any event, the title promises a final insight of the year for repeat offenders–I mean experiencers–of Paranormal World who claim they never asked for their trauma and here it is: the rules are often backwards and that includes what you think you want. Therefore, unlike sexual abuse, no means yes.

You say you didn’t ask for these abduction experiences; you claim not to want this. Linguistics dictate otherwise. Whether we welcome our experiences or not every single one of us has at some point tried to “prove” that they happen. Since there is no proof, really what that means is we’ve tried to convince others that they happen. And when we do that, we own the experiences.

These events that society deems delusional are real. And they happen to me. 

What constitutes the best proof across the board? Witnesses. Lean in. Here comes the insight….

When you say “I have witnesses” you mean you have witnesses to these events that revolve around you. You’re the center of them, the star of the show. If you say you never asked to be the star of the show, I challenge you to be completely honest here. If you are, this will be your breakthrough moment. What a way to welcome 2013!

You say, “So-and-so was with me when it happened.” Or if it was a UFO sighting over a populated area you talk about it as if the crowd of people were superfluous. That vision was for you. If not, you think it. You think that thing in the sky was there for you and you alone to see. The fact that a crowd saw it was confirmation for you. It’s as if by showing up over a populace, the beings are telling you you’re not crazy. Those other hundreds of people? Extras in your movie.

Right?

And if one of your witnesses starts noticing paranormal weirdness in their lives after having a blatant event with you, you take credit for that. You assume you were the starting point for their stuff, not merely the point at which they picked up on what was with them all the time. Or, you deny them. It’s not really happening to them, they’re imagining it and scaring themselves because they’ve been in your constellation. It’s you at the center of this, not them. Your first reaction to a friend confiding in you after a mutual encounter may be relief at the confirmation but if they carry on too long–if they go off-script into their own movie–your next reaction is jealous disbelief.

Right?

How close is that hitting? Just be honest with it. Whether you say you want this or not you jealously guard it. Perhaps this is why so many feel as if they made a prior agreement with this other intelligence to allow these “intrusions” even though they cannot put their finger on when that happened or what that means.

The agreement is within you. You’re keeping this from yourself because you want to be special even in your denial of wanting to be special. If we know nothing else about this seemingly other intelligence it’s that it connects with us on an unconscious level. The unconscious is layered. There’s the impersonal collective and there’s the personal individual. At least those two. It is there in the personal, smothered by verbal protests, that we give our consent.

Whether we “want this” or not.

Jer’s First Book & Movie Available Exclusively Through JayVay!

Hey, Gang:

I’ve decided to stop selling my first book, I Know Why The Aliens Don’t Land! as well as my first DVD, No One’s Watching: An Alien Abductee’s Story through Amazon and Barnes & Noble. It’s simply not cost-effective anymore. I’ll still be selling Urgency. through any and all outlets who will have it, so no worries there.

The upside is, every copy I sell through here will be autographed with a personalized message just for you! (Warning: personalized message may include hand turkeys. Do not take personalized message too seriously.)

The cost of the glorious autographed softcover book is a paltry $15.00 plus shipping. The movie is $10.00 plus shipping. If you live in the U.S. shipping is, like, 3 or 4 dollars. If you live anywhere else it’s more. Too much more, if you ask me.

Thanks for considering. I know you’ll enjoy them provided you have a sense of wonder and a sense of humor. Specifically, mine. So I’ll enjoy them for sure but I’m not so sure about you. Give ‘em a chance anyway. They can’t be any worse than the “normal” ufologogical shitfest you’ve probably dropped a few bucks on in the past.

And with an ad like that how can you say no? Don’t say no. Say Paypal or P.O. Box.

Click here to say YES and also to find out how you can give me even more money for the exact same items!